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Article Excerpt
[ILLUSTRATION OMITTED]
How do you capture XXX-rated lightning in a bottle? In the case of Debbie Does Dallas, you start with a title--one so splendidly alliterative, so lusciously evocative, that it hardly matters that, over the course of the picture's 83-minute running time, Debbie never actually travels to the titular Texas city. Next, you tap directly into the late-seventies cultural zeitgeist with a "plot" that finds our heroine dreaming of joining the world famous "Texas Cowgirls" (read: Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders). In the lead role, you cast Bambi Woods, blond and wide-eyed, never before seen and rarely seen since, a girl-next-door fantasy come delicately and ephemerally to life. And finally, since all iconic porn requires an equally iconic tease, you turn the movie into a game of delayed gratification. Indeed, the biggest surprise of all about Debbie Does Dallas, especially for those of us who've come of age in the era of Internet porn-on-demand, is that it takes a full 70 minutes before Debbie actually "does" anyone. (And no, the lucky guy does not...
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