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Article Excerpt [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED]
I emerged from the vegetative coma I'd slumped into while finishing my last novel, stretched, looked around, and discovered that (a) our house looked as if the Collyer brothers--the notorious pack rats overcome by towers of their own junk--lived there and (b) our only child was turning eighteen the next day. [(paragraph]) I had probably suppressed this last bit of knowledge, since buying presents had become such a fraught activity. In the early years, it was a breeze--a very cost-effective breeze. I would wrap up whatever I found lying around the house: pepper mill, stapler, bag of charcoal briquettes. The Birthday Boy would delight in shredding off the wrapping paper, toss the "gift" aside, crawl into the box and have the "hours of fun" promised by commercials that actual toys failed to deliver (possibly because his mother had neglected to buy sixteen D batteries). [(paragraph]) All too soon, however, he wised up, and actual gifts were forced to enter the equation. Thank God for those crafty...
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